On Tuesday it will have been exactly six months since my surgery.
I'm so excited to be where I am right now! Kneehab is going so, so well, I've finally started doing real throwing exercises again, and I feel really strong. The only problem is that I still have discomfort and pain, but the funny thing is,
My visit to San Diego two weeks ago was fabulous; another visit with Dr. Chao went great, Chris pushed me hard like always, and I got to see all my friends and meet Kassidie. But after running outside for the first time, doing step-ups, normal-speed squats and box jumps, and challenging my knee in a lot of other new ways, it was sore, and my right one was worse! Coming back to Colorado Springs and feeling discouraged because of that discomfort was no fun. In talking with Wendy and taking a good, hard look at how I can choose my own attitude though, I've realized a few things since I've been back, and neat things have happened as a result.
1. It's completely okay to get discouraged. It's how I respond to that feeling that matters. Recognizing negativity and actively dismissing it to choose positivity instead is really powerful, even if the positive feelings are completely unrelated to track and field.
2. I was still feeling down about not knowing a lot of people in Colorado, but as soon as I decided to be friendly and outgoing this week (like the normal me, OMG!), I got invited to a birthday party! High five, universe.
3. Rest is amazing. I've been pushing myself really hard non-stop because I'd love to be able to throw this season, but running myself into the ground is not going to accomplish that. Listening to and agreeing with your body when it tells you it needs a rest (even if it doesn't fit in with your plans) can be extremely beneficial.
The six to nine month post-op window with ACL reconstructions is apparently when the most re-tears happen, so I would appreciate all the positive and strong thoughts everyone can send my way! You better believe that I'm really careful all the time, but any prayers and uplifting energy that you have to spare couldn't hurt. I'm forging ahead with the kneehab plan with extra focus on stability.
Not only did I try some new things in San Diego, but Chris did a bunch of performance measurements to compare my surgery leg with my non-surgery leg. The good news is that literally every measurement he took and test I performed showed that my left leg is at least 90% as good as my right, and in some of them, my left is better now. The bad news is that my self-reported percentage (which I gave strictly thinking about how ready I am to throw a javelin full-speed) is down at 72%, and that one is the most important. The good news about the bad news is that confidence in my abilities is completely up to me. :) Here we go. :)